Former England captain Lewis Moody has announced he has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease and admitted he cannot yet confront the full implications of the muscle-deteriorating condition that claimed the lives of other rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was a member of the 2003 championship side and won numerous English and European titles with Leicester, gave an interview to BBC Breakfast a fortnight after finding out he has the illness.
"There's an element of facing the future and hesitating to completely absorb that at the present time," he commented.
"This doesn't mean I am unaware of where it's going. We grasp that. But there is absolutely a reluctance to confront the future for now."
Moody, conversing alongside his wife Annie, says rather he feels "at ease" as he focuses on his immediate health, his family and getting ready for when the condition worsens.
"Possibly that's surprise or perhaps I handle situations uniquely, and when I have the information, it's more manageable," he added.
Initial Indications
Moody learned he had MND after detecting some reduced power in his shoulder area while exercising in the gym.
After rehabilitation failed to improve the condition, a number of scans revealed nerve cells in his central nervous system had been affected by MND.
"You're given this condition identification of MND and we're rightly quite emotional about it, but it's rather peculiar because I think nothing's wrong," he remarked.
"I don't experience ill. I don't sense poorly
"The signs I have are quite slight. I have a bit of muscle deterioration in the hand area and the upper arm.
"I'm still competent to doing all activities. And with luck that will continue for as long as is attainable."
Condition Development
MND can develop rapidly.
Based on the organization MND Association, the illness claims a 33% of people within a twelve months and above half within 730 days of detection, as eating and respiration become increasingly challenging.
Therapy can only delay deterioration.
"It's never me that I am upset for," commented an emotional Moody.
"It's the sadness around having to inform my mum - as an sole offspring - and the ramifications that has for her."
Personal Consequences
Conversing from the household with his wife and their pet dog by his side, Moody was overcome with sentiment when he discussed telling his sons - 17-year-old Dylan and 15-year Ethan - the traumatic news, commenting: "It was the toughest thing I've ever had to do."
"These are two brilliant boys and that was rather devastating," Moody said.
"We sat on the sofa in tears, Ethan and Dylan both hugging in each other, then the dog jumped over and began cleaning the drops off our faces, which was quite funny."
Moody said the focus was staying in the now.
"There exists no solution and that is why you have to be very militantly focused on just accepting and savoring all aspects now," he commented.
"According to Annie, we've been very lucky that the sole determination I made when I left playing was to allocate as much time with the kids as feasible. We don't get those times back."
Sportsman Association
Professional competitors are unevenly influenced by MND, with studies proposing the prevalence of the disease is up to six times elevated than in the general population.
It is thought that by limiting the air available and causing injury to motor neurone cells, consistent, vigorous physical activity can trigger the illness in those previously vulnerable.
Sports Professional Life
Moody, who gained 71 England selections and traveled with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was called 'Mad Dog' during his sports career, in recognition of his brave, relentless method to the game.
He participated through a fracture of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once initiated a practice confrontation with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, annoyed, he discarded a tackle pad and started engaging in physical contacts.
After coming on as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup final win over Australia in 2003, he secured a ball at the back of the line-out in the crucial moment of play, establishing a platform for half-back Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the match-winning field goal.
Assistance Network
Moody has already notified Johnson, who skippered England to that championship, and a handful of other ex- players about his diagnosis, but the rest will be learning his news with the rest of public.
"There will be a time when we'll need to depend on their assistance but, at the moment, just having that kind of love and acceptance that people are present is the crucial thing," he commented.
"This game is such a wonderful community.
"I mentioned to the kids the other day, I've had an extraordinary life.
"Even if it ended now, I've valued all of it and welcomed all of it and got to do it with remarkable people.
"When you get to consider your love your vocation, it's one of the greatest honors.
"To have done it for so long a period with the squads that I did it with was a joy. And I am aware they will desire to support in whatever way they can and I look forward to having those talks."
